Repent & Return to your first LOVE

As I mentioned in my last post, the Lord’s been dealing with me on building a regimen and being consistent in my relationship with him, producing the heart of relationship through my writing, and bringing encouragement in sharing the Good News! At the entry of my 43rd birthday, my spirit was praying “Lord deliver me from the pestilence; that which seeks to destroy me & take my life!

Pestilence – a plague, anything that destroys – producing death. A pronounced or spoken promise looking to subdue you (in a destructive sense).

Of course this caused me to shift, asking God why is there a plague upon me? I knew the Lord wasn’t playing with me! But I didn’t know how how far or deep my identity detachment was, nor how much of the enemies lies I actually believed! Every time I plan to write, I get attacked! I start overthinking how to share & become too self-involved which makes me self-conscious, and I begin questioning my authority and hide from writing. Now that I think about it, it’s really crazy lol, because I know I can’t hide from God. This pestilence, is the sin that has so easily besets me – working hard to keep me separated from God.

"He that hath an ear, let him hear what the Spirit saith unto the churches; To him that overcometh will I give to eat of the tree of life, which is in the midst of the paradise of God." Revelation 2:7 (KJV)

To hear is to respond to what you heard. It’s literally a gift – to hear. To respond adequately, in good measure so that you can actually attend to the thing you heard. To hear means that you’ve been given a gift of endowment. You are not deaf! Hallelujah!!! You can perceive & understand what is said to you; therefore, because I can hear (thank you Lord), I must give audience to what He says & respond.

So the charge against me, is that I’ve left my first love; losing the depth of love I first had for Him. In referencing Revelation 2:5, I’m literally at risk for having my lampstand removed. I recognize that I’m not common. I wasn’t created to walk regular and adjust to normalcy and comfort. However, it’s a hard place to stand in – if you’re not strengthened. This place of movement can only be navigated through agreement and the strength of the Spirit.

From great depth, comes the Power to produce!

Holy Spirit

When you allow yourself to live in and through the depth of your relationship with God, He gives you the ability to produce fruit (Rev. 2:7). I thank the Holy Spirit for showing me that work for Him must be motivated by my love for Him, or it will not last. I can’t build a regimen & be consistent in my relationship seeing only with my natural eyes. As I sought the Lord on what He was saying to me, I recognized that my lack of faith, disobedience, and slow-fulness to act was keeping me in bondage.

"And he said to her, Daughter, your faith has made you well. Go in peace, Your suffering is over." Mark 5:34 (NLT)
Reference Texts: Mark 10:52; Luke 7:50, 17:19, 18:42; Acts 14:9

So what does all this mean???

  • I MUST begin consistently moving in what I believe about Him – Not Me!
  • I can no longer move in what I’m fearful of!
  • My faith & belief in Jesus is my call to action; my call to ignition & implementation
  • My faith is my permission! It’s me operating & moving from a permitted place (as in Ephesus)
  • I’m permitted to BELIEVE
  • I’m permitted to EXPECT
  • I’m permitted to PREACH
  • I’m permitted to ENCOURAGE
  • I’m permitted to hold up a standard

This is about me having FAITH to be healed (in every measure)!

  • Faith to be healed from fear (false evidence appearing real)
  • Faith to be healed from not knowing (what to do or how to do it)
  • Faith to be healed from not seeing (which way to go)
  • Faith to be healed from not walking (staying stagnant, immovable, & ultimately disobedient)
  • Faith to be healed from not hearing (not responding to that which I hear)
  • Faith to be healed from not believing (that you are with me – Matt. 28:20; 1 Chron. 28:20; Deut. 31:6, 8; Gen. 28:15; Heb. 13:5; Josh. 1:5, 9)
  • Faith to be healed from unworthiness (refuting doubt & declaring Eph. 4:1-4)

When I don’t operate in faith, the plague & pestilence is able to rest.
He lets it rest upon you, take you over & take you out!

It’s the penalty of disobedience (Lev. 26:14-25)

The Spirit of the Lord says: As much as I’ve shown you; as much treasure as you hold, you continue to revert to fear and go back to bondage.

I’m responding to measures of slavery in my thoughts and actions, when I’ve been set free (Gal. 5:1). The call is for me to Stand Up, Gird Up My Loins, Strengthen my hands & feet to Move and Go therefore in the strength I have! (Hebrews 12:12-13 & Judges 6:14).

Prayer: Lord I thank you for this word of rebuke & encouragement. I’m so grateful that there is no defeat in you, only blessings & lessons. Thank you for never leaving or forsaking me. From everlasting you continue to draw me with your loving kindness, thank you for your love. Please forgive me for all the sins I’ve committed by thought, word, & deed, ever since the last time I asked you to forgive me. Forgive me from hiding from you, teach me how to dwell in you always. Lord, don’t let my lampstand be removed from its place, help me to be and give light in every area of my life. I repent for being slowful, disobedient, & doubting; pursuing my own desires more than you. Help me to be honorable and live an honorable life – pointing myself, my children and others away from sin. Heal me from the inside out Lord! Release me from every plague, every displeasing measure within me – remove it now, in the name of Jesus. My faith makes me whole, I am healed, and I walk in peace – in the name of Jesus I pray! Amen

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